The objective is to be in awareness. You must simply be aware of what you do when you are doing it, not afterwards! There is nothing wrong in wanting to reproduce what you like and avoid what you dislike. This is the way we are. What matters is the spontaneous awareness of what is happening. All human beings have the same essence and the same consciousness, because we are basically sentient through life and life is one. The only difference between beings is the degree of awareness.
Spontaneous awareness of our state, whether it be pleasure or anger, peace or violence, results in neutralization of the manifestation of these attributes. This is why we have the ritual washing before prayer. The intention of this cleansing is to render every moment pure and fresh, and that comes by pure awareness. It is alertness without being two. In most of our societies we have split ourselves, the judge and the judged. This is because there is hypocrisy in us. Self-judgement and blame are different from spontaneous, instantaneous awareness, which is the fruit of remembrance of God, dhikr.
By Shaykh Fadhlalla Haeri from the book “The Sufi Way to Self-Unfoldment”